YOOOOOOOOO. (:

i'm almost (5 mins away from second bell) for school today. wtf ok, never had i beeen so late and feeeling so damn unhappy. for 16 years, i was never treated as princess (whats more QUEEN?) at home. and he was treated as KING. tmd, i hate to say this.. but i'm really jealous (laugh lor, i dont care).

ok, i'm jealous of a 11 year old and someone i barely know for 2 days. &i'm pissed too. whenever i wake up late, i dont even have time for breakfast or even a cup of hot drink.. and yet, today i've to wait for someone else. and later, almost delayed for school. i've not beeen in the best mood for days and today i felt worst. otw to school, called my mother and my father answered the phone. i straight away ask my father to call my mother. and i started the conversation with a bad word. and more to come...

i hate this. i mean... whats this la. i'm only 5 years older and can you all stop asking me to be sensible? seriously speaking, i've beeen trying real hard to be a good sister, a good host and everything else. did you all seee or not? and no one knows how many problems is weighing down my heart. YOU ALLL DONT KNOW.

school was fine la. ... and alot of hw is waiting for me.. yet i've to go ahma house later for dinner and i dont know what time will i be back. ...

after sch went home and i started saying my bro because of this morning. and... his face got damn black. i felt so.... sad.. you know, i'm trying real hard to be nice? and... yet, all i got is attitude. wtf. i hate this... and later i really cannot take all these shit things, and i went into the toilet to cry. i hate to let tears flow. you know, i have to cry silently so that my parents wont know? i dont want to tell them at all... its like, they're tired tooo right. i hate to cry and i hate the feeeling of being neglect, being attitude and.. yet, no one understands how hard you're trying.

seriously, i'm only 16. pls dont expect so much from me. all my parents know is my bro's tired from sch and what abt me? i've beeen in sch since morning tilll 4+. so what's his compared to mine? =,=

ohyes, just now.. i even started pointing fingers. my father&mother both know i'm feeeling sad (& suspect they heard me cry) and they tried to comfort me. but... i still felt sad. i dont know. days of being neglect and now this.. it makes me feeel only slightly better. (at least, after days.. they realise i'm not feeeeling goood). for days, i havent beeen laughing much at home or talking much abt my day... first time, i dont laugh so much or feeel like talking for a long time... haiz. i want to be nice, but.. no one's teaching me how to? i'm trying hard to...

dont comment on this entry tooooo.
i'm not alright but.. i'll survive. (:

to all hpys who tried to cheer me ytd, ty... =)